Does positive thinking really create better results?
When my late wife, Sheri, and I were first married, her father took me aside to give me advice I’ve never forgotten: “Think big, and you will be.”
My great friend, Dr. Tony Alessandra, related that when he was working on his Ph.D. at Georgia State University, his professor was Dr. David Schwartz — known for the popular book, “The Magic of Thinking Big.”
And the late, great Zig Ziglar wrote and constantly spoke on the importance of how we think, telling his audiences and readers that we all need a “checkup from the neck up.”
It begs two questions: First, does how we think actually impact our results?
And second, if our thinking does make a difference, how can we change it to improve our attitude and, subsequently, our actions?
Most motivational psychologists suggest the answer to the first question is a resounding “Yes!” Just as exercise strengthens our physical muscles, so do our thoughts shape and mold our minds. Our attitudes are a direct result of our predominant thoughts.
For example, the Mayo Clinic lists these personal results from a positive approach:
Increased life span
Lower rates of depression
Lower levels of distress and pain
Greater resistance to illnesses
Better psychological and physical well-being
Better cardiovascular health and reduced risk of death from cardiovascular disease and stroke
Reduced risk of death from cancer
Reduced risk of death from respiratory conditions
Reduced risk of death from infections
Better coping skills during hardships and times of stress
When it comes to business, Harvard says, “Research shows that when people work with a positive mindset, performance on nearly every level—productivity, creativity, engagement—improves.”
Those are powerful results! To achieve them for yourself, start by asking:
What attitude do you want to have?
What kind of person do you want to be?
And remember: the attitude we display toward others is just a reflection of the attitude we have toward ourselves.
It all starts with self-acceptance: liking yourself just the way you are — warts and all. From that foundation, everything else follows. It will be difficult to like others if you don’t like yourself. If you don’t think highly of yourself, it will be tough to think highly of others. It’s hard to have a positive attitude when you’re trying to cover up a negative self-image.
Three steps to improving your self-concept are:
Choose your attitude. We need to start teaching students (and it’s never too late to learn) that attitude is one of the few aspects of life over which we have total control. If you decide to have a bad attitude, you can make yourself and everyone around you miserable with your negativity. If your choice is on the other end of the spectrum, you can have a stellar approach to what life puts in your path.
I promise that you know someone who has more difficulties than you and that has a better attitude than the one you currently possess. Conversely, I’ll bet you also know someone who has it better than your current situation who is still miserable and unappreciative.
Decide what kind of person you want to be. For example, my wife, Tammy, decided she wanted to be more involved in our community and give more to others because of her gratitude for our blessings. After making those decisions, she has become highly involved with a program called Cup of Hope that helps feed and inspire homeless men and women here in Las Vegas. Many people experiencing difficulties have been helped through her volunteering — and Tammy has grown into more of the person she desires to be by first deciding precisely what she wants.
Determine the price you’re willing to pay to achieve it. It’s long been called the “Coke bottle philosophy of life: No deposit. No return.” I heard a speaker once say the only time you ever get handed millions for nothing is if you win the lottery. I had to disagree — even to win the lottery, you have to go to the store and spend the money to purchase a ticket.
The question you must ask yourself is, what price are you willing to pay to achieve what you want? I can say that I want to write a book — but if I fail to put the seat of my pants in the seat of a chair and write…instead of watching television or going to a ball game…then it’s all just empty talk!
“Our attitude toward life determines life’s attitude towards us,” wrote the legendary Earl Nightingale.
My friend Brian Tracy has said, “You cannot control what happens to you, but you can control your attitude toward what happens to you, and in that, you will be mastering change rather than allowing it to master you.”
The second question — how do we change our thinking? — is just as important as the first.
Several speaker pals of mine use a critical quote: “In software programming, it’s popular to say GIGO: garbage in, garbage out. However, when it comes to how we think and how our minds work, it’s GIGS: garbage in, garbage stays.”
Just as there are exercise programs to get our physical bodies in shape, so too are there mental exercises we can perform to “strengthen our minds.” Here are some suggestions:
Read books and articles that inspire you and reinforce positive thinking. (Some of my favorites are the previously mentioned “The Magic of Thinking Big” by David Schwartz, “The Power of Positive Thinking” by Norman Vincent Peale, and “Atomic Habits” by James Clear.)
Find a mentor or coach who can help you stay focused on your goals and think positive thoughts.
Hang around people who are positive and upbeat. I’m always amazed at how my attitude improves when I’m around people like that!
Practice gratitude. Every day, make it a point to think of five things you’re grateful for in your life. You’ll be surprised at how this simple exercise can change your attitude for the better.
Make it a habit to think and speak words of encouragement to yourself throughout the day. Stop beating yourself up over every minor issue that doesn’t turn out perfectly.
Give yourself regular “attitude checkups.” At the end of each day, ask yourself how you did in terms of staying positive and keeping a good attitude. If you slip up, don’t beat yourself up — just resolve to do better tomorrow.
Just as it’s essential to take care of our physical health, it is just as vital to regularly monitor our mental and emotional well-being. When we pay attention to our thoughts and attitude, we can ensure we’re thinking positive thoughts that will lead to positive actions and results.
Resolve to give yourself a daily “checkup from the neck up” — and watch your life become more distinctive!
When the world around you is running hot, it’s essential for you to stay cool.
I don’t remember a time when there was so much aggression and meanness in the culture. Your challenge is how you will deal with it.
Perhaps this situation is a result of tearing down the walls of civility we became accustomed to expecting. Maybe it’s the natural outgrowth of the intense divisions we are currently experiencing in America and worldwide. Nonetheless, stress and aggression can quickly escalate into dangerous situations, so it’s crucial to remain calm and level-headed, regardless of whether we’re talking about our professional or personal encounters.
Here are three of the many conditions making the workplace increasingly stressful:
Social media has created a more open and interconnected world, which can be positive. But it also means constant bombardment with new information and updates (some of which may be completely false). The result can be a sense of overwhelm for many people.
The global economy is increasingly competitive, which puts pressure on businesses to perform. This can lead to longer hours and increased stress for employees.
Political divisions are causing tension in many workplaces. Whether it’s arguments about the upcoming election or different opinions on current events, this stress can spill over into our professional lives.
Stress in business is higher today than ever before. Stress in the workplace can lead to aggression and unwarranted levels of confrontation. The pressures our customers are under — in many cases created by their dealings with other organizations, not our own — can lead to responses from them that aren’t congruent and are needlessly assertive.
It is crucial for business owners and managers to understand how to keep their cool when everyone around them is losing theirs. Here are five simple tips for staying cool under pressure:
Take a deep breath: It sounds clichéd, but deep breathing really can help to calm you down. Focus on taking slow, deep breaths and count to four as you inhale and out as you exhale.
Identify your triggers: What makes you lose your cool? Once you know what sets you off, you can try to avoid those situations or be prepared for them mentally.
Walk away: If you feel yourself getting agitated, remove yourself from the situation if possible. Go for a walk, take a break in another room, or even step outside for fresh air.
Talk it out: Sometimes, the best way to calm down is to talk through whatever is causing your stress. Find a friend or colleague you trust and vent your frustrations. Getting them off your chest can help make them feel less daunting.
Focus on the positive: When you’re feeling stressed, it’s easy to dwell on a situation’s negative aspects. Instead, focus on the positive aspects in your life, no matter how small. This can help to put things into perspective and remind you that the current stressor is not the be-all and end-all.
Staying cool when those around you are losing their temper can be difficult, but it’s essential to remain calm in order to diffuse tense situations. By following these tips, you can help to keep yourself – and those around you – safer from stress-induced challenges.
Every day, more emails land in my inbox offering an opportunity to take a course or participate in a program designed to help grow my business or advance my financial standing.
While there’s no doubt that — like everyone else — I’d love my business to expand and my bank account to be enhanced. Yet, such widely varied choices are available that I often simply “keep on keeping on” without the help these opportunities may provide.
There are so many opportunities available in today’s world that we sometimes get paralyzed by a plethora of choices. While it’s great to have options, too many can be overwhelming.
If you’re feeling overwhelmed by opportunity, here are a few tips to help you narrow down your choices:
1. Define your goals. What are you hoping to achieve? If you aren’t specific with your goals, it’s almost impossible to discern what can help you get to where you want to be. Once you know what you want, you can eliminate options that don’t align with your goals.
2. Do your research. When you’ve got a shortlist of potential opportunities, take some time to learn more about each one. What are the pros and cons? What do other people say about it? There are some brilliant programs available to help you in your journey to achievement. Sadly, however, today’s world of online learning has made it much easier for shysters to go virtual. Take a moment to do your homework on both the program and the presenter.
3. Trust your gut. At the end of the day, you know yourself best. If something feels right, go for it! Nike never says, “Just THINK ABOUT IT!” We all know that they tell us to “Just DO IT!” That’s frequently great advice in all endeavors — not just for athletes.
Don’t let opportunity overwhelm you. By taking some time to evaluate your options, you can make sure you choose the right opportunity for you.
There is no distinction without action — and you can discover the action steps you need to take by expanding your learning. Then, go for it with all you’ve got!
Every business has a story to tell, and yours is no different. What sets your story apart from the rest makes it engaging and distinctive. Customers seek a reason to connect with your business, your story must be one they can’t resist.
For a decade, I had the most incredible “side hustle” one could imagine. I was a nationally syndicated movie reviewer. When movies were a couple of weeks away from their release, the studios frequently invited me to participate in what they called their “junkets.” Typically, I would fly to New York or Los Angeles on a Friday, see the new movie before its public release, then spend Saturday interviewing the film’s stars, director, and screenwriter.
My work as a movie reviewer allowed me to interview famous actors from Meryl Streep to Tom Hanks, John Travolta to Faye Dunaway, and Samuel L. Jackson to Bruce Willis.
What I learned is the principles that made for a box office smash were also the precise aspects that every business and professional needed to discover to stand out and earn more. They make up the exact steps required to create distinction.
The steps are easy to remember and are often based on the acronym, S.T.O.R.Y.
S – Select your subject (What do you want to be known for?)
T – Target your audience (Who needs and wants to know your story?)
O – Outline the content (What details will you share?)
R – Record your story (How will you tell it?)
Y – Your story’s finish line (What’s the point of sharing your story?)
Answering these questions is the key to discovering what makes your story distinctive and engaging. It’s also how to clarify what you want to be known for professionally or in business. You can use these principles to storytelling in a way that not only educates but also entertains, engages, and inspires your audience.
When you understand the elements of what makes for a great story, you can begin to see how it can be applied to business and professional situations. It starts with knowing the steps required to create a narrative that captivates an audience and showing them how to apply your story’s principles in business and life. Here are a few examples:
S – Select your subject: In business, this could be choosing what it is you want to be known for. Are you the go-to person for your organization’s product or service? Do you have a unique perspective or method that you can share with others? The First Cornerstone of Distinction is CLARITY. When you’re precise about your subject, you’ve made progress towards achieving the first rung on the distinction ladder.
T – Target your audience: This is identifying your target market or ideal client in business. Who are they, and what do they need or want to know? Again, by being precise and clear on who our audience is, we move towards distinction in our story.
O – Outline the content: In business, this is determining what details you will share in your story. What information will be most helpful or interesting to your audience? How will you present a story that shows the characters of your narrative overcoming a conflict that your audience will find compelling?
R – Record your story: In business, this is deciding how you will deliver your story to your target audience. Will you write a blog post, give a presentation, post it on social media, or create a video?
Y – Your story’s finish line: In business, this is the primary purpose of sharing your story. What do you hope to achieve by telling it? Are you looking to educate, entertain, engage, or inspire your audience? Is your story (as Jim Rohn used to say) an example of what to do…or a warning of what must be avoided? Either way, the story’s conclusion must drive your audience to want to take action that benefits you and your organization.
Telling your story in a way that resonates with your audience is essential to success in business. By understanding what makes for a great story, you can ensure that yours captivates and engages your target market. Your story makes you unique, so use it to your advantage to engage potential customers by sharing what makes your business exceptional. If you can capture their attention, you’ll be well on your way to making a lasting impression of distinction.
It’s been my privilege to help professionals and organizations discover how to craft and tell their “Distinctive Story.” I’d love to assist you in this process, as well. Contact us on LinkedIn – or respond to this email – for more information and to start on your journey to captivate customers and prospects.
This phrase (“WADITW”) is a primary enemy of change and innovation. It’s why many companies and leaders are stuck in the past, unable to move forward and improve the customer experience.
A crucial aspect of “we’ve always done it that way” is that it reflects a lack of imagination. It’s an admission that we’re not willing to change, even when it’s clear that change is needed.
Change is difficult because of several reasons — here are three primary factors:
It’s easy to get stuck in the past. We feel comfortable with the results we’re currently achieving, so why rock the boat?
Change can be scary. We’re hesitant to take risks because we cannot be confident about the future.
Change requires effort. It’s often easier to stay the course and keep doing things the way we’ve always done them.
The bottom line: changeis hard. But it’s necessary if we want to improve the customer experience. You should first recognize that “we’ve always done it that way” is a disease we must cure. Only then can we start making the changes needed to create a better future for our customers and businesses.
To move past “WADITW,” we must be willing to commit to change.
We need to be open to new ways of doing things. And most importantly, we need to develop our imagination to see the possibilities that change can bring.
The good news is that change is possible.
It starts with a willingness to let go of the past and embrace the future.
It requires imagination and creativity.
And it takes courage to face the discomfort that comes with change.
So, if you’re ready to make a change, ask yourself these three questions:
What needs to change?
What can we do differently?
How can we make this change happen?
Answering these questions will help you move beyond WADITW and into a brighter future for your company and customers.
Next, solve your WADITW problem by taking these three steps:
The first step is recognizing that the status quo is never good enough. We must constantly look for ways to improve, even if that means breaking from the past. Only then can we hope to deliver the Ultimate Customer Experience® that our customers deserve.
The next step is to be proactive. We can’t just sit around and hope that change will happen. This means challenging the way things have always been done and finding new and better ways to do them. It might be uncomfortable initially, but it’s essential if we want to move forward.
The third step is to constantly evaluate our performance. Are we stuck in our ways? Are we still doing things the same way, even though it’s no longer working? It’s essential to be honest with ourselves and always look for ways to improve. Otherwise, we’ll never change, and we’ll never be able to deliver the customer experience they deserve.
The good news is that plenty of examples of companies have overcome the disease of WADITW. They’ve been able to change and innovate, and as a result, they’re delivering a much better customer experience.
We can change — and we can deliver an Ultimate Customer Experience. It starts with recognizing the need for change, then taking action to make it happen. “We’ve always done it that way” is a disease that is holding us back. But it doesn’t have to be this way. Make this day into the day that you create distinction.
At a time when our world seems increasingly divided and fraught with conflict, it is more important than ever to be kind and compassionate toward one another. Whether interacting with customers or colleagues, friends or family members — or even total strangers — we should always try to display good intentions and show courtesy and respect.
This pervasive sense of meanness and anger in today’s culture is constantly perplexing to me. It’s showing up in our businesses and displaying itself in almost every walk of life.
A primary aspect of a great business and extraordinary customer experiences is simple respect and kindness. Here are three steps we can take to display that we care:
1. Listen more and talk less. We can learn a lot about someone by genuinely listening to them without interruption or judgment.
2. Seek first to understand, then to be understood. This is a principle from Stephen Covey’s classic book “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People.” It means that we should try to see things from the other person’s perspective before communicating our point of view.
3. Put ourselves in the other person’s shoes. This is similar to the previous point, but it takes it one step further. Not only should we try to understand where the other person is coming from, but we should also try to empathize with them and feel what they are feeling.
Just because a person is from a differing political viewpoint, or a dissimilar religion or a different race or gender doesn’t mean they deserve disrespect. Today’s social media has created a lot of “keyboard courage” — people sending messages via Twitter or Facebook that they would have difficulty saying in person to someone. However, part of what we’re seeing is a lowering of the standards of common courtesy. After you get away with bad behavior online for a while, perhaps it becomes easier for many to assume that you can act that way in person, as well.
Here’s a fundamental challenge when it comes to this problem. As I state in the book “ICONIC,” when it comes to reciprocal respect, the key is that YOU must go first.
This is NOT to say you should alter your opinion.
It’s not to say you should diminish your beliefs.
However, you cannot wait for the other person to show you respect before sending it their way.
That kind of “I’ll do it if you do” approach will never work! It is also antithetical to the principles of respect and kindness. Instead, we need to proactively show others that we care about them — not just with our words but with our actions.
By practicing these small acts of kindness and courtesy at every opportunity, we can bring more compassion and empathy into the world around us. If more people made a conscious effort to be just a bit gentler toward one another, perhaps we could begin to heal some of the wounds currently ripping our society apart.
Even if we only make a slight difference in this world, that would still be worth doing. Let’s try a little kindness today — in our daily interactions with others, as well as in our broader efforts to create a better society.
